If there’s one question I’ve heard most often in the 15 or so years I’ve been involved in the homeschool community from others its “But what about socialization?” I always find this question humorous, because it’s just not something I’ve ever worried about.
When I was in eighth grade, I was given the choice to either homeschool or transfer to a public school from the small private school I was currently attending. The thought of a huge high school was completely overwhelming for the painfully shy, insecure girl that I was, and I chose to be homeschooled.
While being homeschooled, I lived with or spent extensive time with my cousins (twelve of them!). I took science classes with other homeschoolers (lab and all, if that’s something else you worry about). I took trips with my friends. I went to hockey games. I worked a part-time job and had some very interesting social experiences! I participated in Youth in Government, with two different statewide competitions each year. I made some stupid teenage decisions. I developed friendships. I had a graduation. And in those four years, I blossomed. I grew a lot in my confidence level, and came out of my shell. I went from being terrified of speaking in public to only mildly shaky at the idea 
I’m firmly convinced that having the opportunity to grow in my confidence level gradually, and interact with people in a more real-life way, was crucial to who I am today. If I had gone to a huge public highschool, and been forced to interact for hours and hours five days a week in that artificial, “mean girls” environment, I would have completely withdrawn. I probably would have retreated into some very poor choices as a coping mechanism that could have had lasting damage.
Yes, I just called schools an artificial environment. I don’t know any other time in our lives where we are forced to interact with 20-30 of our age-level peers for hours every day, regardless of common interest or goals. Since being married and having children, I’ve had friendships with my age-level peers from college. But I’ve also had dear friends who were also married with children close to my children’s age, who were 10-20 years my senior. And friendships with people who are in completely different stages of life, but we have other interests in common, or we just click. My husband works in an office. Some of his co-workers are a lot younger than him, a few around the same age, and some are a bit older.
Now, none of the above is meant to criticize those who choose to send their children to public school. If its working for your family, that is great! But I don’t think it is the only (or even the best) method for children to be socialized.
Maybe you’re reading all this, and you’re still thinking, “Yeah, but I know this one kid who was homeschooled, and he was so socially awkward.” I’m not discounting that experience. I am quite sure there are socially awkward homeschoolers. But don’t you remember some socially awkward kids at your school? I know I remember some, and have met some completely awkward adults who made it through public school still awkward. Some people are just more socially challenged, regardless of where they go to school, so please don’t write us all of because of that one kid or family.
Since I’m not worried about socialization, we spend all our time at home sitting around the kitchen table, right? Well, not quite I’ll share a bit more about the ways we do get out in the world, and tips for giving homeschooled children opportunities to make friends outside the family next week.
Do you worry about socialization? Do you think it’s hard for homeschoolers to be properly socialized? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments!
