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Getting Back on My Feet… Or Trying To.

November 7, 2011 By Melissa

I shared in my post last week that I am currently struggling. Finding myself in a downward spiral, which I fear is rapidly headed toward another battle with depression.

One of my goals for myself was honesty. Without honesty, it’s impossible to have true community. And I’ve been so blessed by people who have reached out to me since I was willing to share. A sweet friend took me out for coffee Monday evening, and asked what she could do to help. She also helped me step back and try to figure out what areas of my life are triggering the most stress, and we tried to troubleshoot some ways to address them. Just having someone reach out and feeling free to talk about where I’m at was very healing. I was so thankful for the encouragement people shared in the comments on my post, and the women who opened up to say that they are there too, or have been there recently. Friends have reached out on Twitter, and pointed me to supportive communities on there. Another friend who lives close by has brought by meals a few times, which has been such a huge blessing. My husband has been amazing as well, even when his advice is hard for my perfectionist self to follow, like, “Go to bed and write your blog post in the morning. You need sleep.”

And speaking of sleep, this week has reminded me again how big of a trigger sleep deprivation is for me. My oldest and my youngest were both very sick this past week. The baby spiked a fever of 105 at one point, and for several days the only way to keep his temperature manageable was to alternate motrin and tylenol every 3 hours around the clock (per his pediatrician’s instructions). My 7 year old had a severe stomach bug and was on the verge of getting severely dehydrated. No one slept well. In addition to the many sleep interruptions, I’ve been struggling with insomnia this week. Something that seems completely ridiculous with how exhausted I am! I’m not sure how to get more sleep right now, but I’m going to try to work on it, even if it means occasionally I get behind on e-mails or Twitter and take a nap, or go to bed and risk putting a post up past my self-imposed deadline.

I didn’t get very far on my schedule last week, other than to type it up. With so much sickness, we pretty much watched movies. All. Week. Long. But today is a new day, and with everyone feeling better I’m going to try to use my schedule as a guide. I’m hoping it can bring some more direction to our days and make things more peaceful, but if it proves to be to much we will revisit it.

Thank you for encouraging me and for “listening.” Thank you for giving me the freedom to be real, even when real isn’t what I want it to be.

Read full story · Comments { 1 } in Keeping it Real, Motherhood, Parenting, Sleep

Planning to Fail? Working on Discipline and Schedules

July 15, 2011 By Jeniffer

Last week, I mentioned that I do not have a schedule or a plan to start reading to my little girl daily. Well, truthfully, I do not have a plan or a schedule at all. Period. Nada.

Oh, I try to get Little Bit into bed by a certain time, but that has been difficult with her daddy working ridiculously late hours. And often I find myself on the computer until 8 or 9 at night. When she finally does doze off, I remember that I haven’t given her a bath. Again. Or that she’s in the same diaper that I changed, um, right before supper…at 8:30. If I do decide to wake her up again, she’s up for the next hour or two, all on that maybe twenty minute’s worth of rest.

I confess, it’s bad.

Don’t even get me started on our morning routine.

The real problem is that I know I’m supposed to keep her on some sort of routine or rhythm. I’ve taken classes on child development. I know how much better babies and young children thrive on a schedule, even a flexible one. But I don’t have one.

Yet.

I obviously have a problem with keeping up with a long, detailed schedule. I see this enormous mountain in front of me, and I have no clue how to scale it. So instead I plop back down on the couch, run around a couple of days a week trying to do a few things, and leave lots undone.

Or I’ll start with a plan, keep it up for about a week, congratulate myself on a job well done, and then return to the couch for a day. But that day? It ends up being a week. A month. And I’m back where I started.

Enter the 3 in 30 Challenge.

Apparently others have the same trouble: staying focused on goals and lists, eventually laying them by the wayside. What do they do? Break down lofty goals into three little goals per month. Bite-sized, easy to chew, doable goals!

So, instead of me saying, “I’m going to work on keeping the kitchen spotless every day, keeping the laundry cleared, and making sure that Abby has a bedtime schedule,” I can say instead, “For this month, I’m going to work on keeping the dishes washed after each meal, giving Abby a bath every night, and reading my Bible in the morning.” See how much easier that is? And guess what. If I don’t “master” a goal this month, I can work on it next month too! No, I don’t see this as a license to perpetually mess up but as a way of not beating myself up over it. (Being a procrastinating perfectionist, I can have some mean self-talk if I don’t watch it! This gives me enough slack that I can shut myself up easily.)

I love the fact that I won’t be alone in this. There’s a Facebook group, a Twitter handle, a weekly blog linkup…there’s definitely accountability! So even if I don’t feel like doing it, the fact that there are hundreds of others behind me, encouraging me to keep pressing forward, will help keep me motivated. While I will be sharing my progress on here every now and then, I’ll be sharing my journey on my personal blog weekly. If you’re interested in seeing how well I do or just wanting to encourage me a little, please feel free to stop by! I’d love to see you there.

This month, for the rest of the month, and next month if needed, I’ll be working on these three goals:

Reading my Bible daily~attitude change
Filling out my gift list daily~attitude change
Giving Abby a bath every night~working on a schedule

There are so many goals that I want to accomplish, so much that I want to do. I want to clean my house more often. I want to get laundry done in a more efficient way. I want to have a daily routine for my family. I want to learn to cook better. And I’ll get there, baby step by baby step.

3 in 30. 36 in 365. I can do that.