This year is my first time to participate in Lent. Growing up, Lent was not practiced in our faith family, though some of my friends participated in it in the past. I was never drawn to it, though. Until this year.

This year, after reading Ann Voskamp’s pre-Lent post, I knew it was something that I needed to do. The night before Ash Wednesday, I found myself wondering what to give up, deciding on sodas, a huge weakness of mine especially since I stopped eating dairy and soy. And then I realized there was something else: I needed to pay more attention to what God is telling me. Listening. Not just hearing, but doing. So I’m giving something up and taking something on.

Here’s the thing, though: I thought I was giving up sodas to show my devotion to God. I thought I was listening to show my devotion to God. But I wasn’t.

I gave up sodas, and a week later I caught a cold. Which I normally use sodas to break up. Caffeine and carbonation are a beautiful thing. But not this time. I fought it. Hard. And through the fighting it, I started listening more.

Again, I thought I was showing my devotion. I thought wrong. Through the listening, I found several songs that have lifted my spirit. And through them, I found audio recordings of George Muller’s thoughts on prayer. His experiences have not only encouraged me but also others- and always at the perfect time.

The most recent change that Lent has brought this year? I am working harder on putting Romans 1 to memory. I had decided to put it to memory this year, but I did not have a very good plan. So now? I’m keeping the first 10 verses at the forefront of my memory, reciting them over and over at times when I would have previously looked at my phone. Over and over, the words are changing the ways that I think of myself and my “job” as a mom. They are changing me.

So here, just over halfway through Lent, I’m realizing that it’s not about me showing my devotion but about God showing me just how desperately I need Him. And when Easter morning rises this year, I will be celebrating more than just the end of Lent. I will be celebrating the end of the burden of the Law, the end of the guilt and the shame that comes from not being able to keep it, and I will be celebrating with more enthusiasm in many years the resurrection of our Lord Jesus Christ!

Do you participate in Lent? What are you giving up/taking on?

Our family leaves Friday to go to Florida for a two week training with Wycliffe, and we have been praying since my daughter broke her leg that the cast would be able to come off before our trip. She had an appointment yesterday, and I literally cried tears of joy when my husband sent me the text letting me know that the cast was coming off! Unfortunately, last night and today have not gone quite the way I expected. After months of being in a cast, my daughter is convinced that she’s forgotten how to walk. Her muscles are stiff, her ankle is weak, and she is scared. She also doesn’t trust my husband and I when we remind her that her leg is healed. That she is allowed to walk on it. That the doctor told us she was fine, and just needed to walk on it slowly and build her strength back up.

After months of longing for freedom from the wheelchair and cast, my daughter is crying out for the familiarity they offer. They may have been bondage, but they had become normal, and freedom is scary, and walking forward in it is hard.

To say that I have been frustrated would be putting things far to mildly. I have offered calm encouragement, but I have also gritted my teeth, rolled my eyes, and felt like a complete failure as a parent for my daughter’s horrible attitude about things. To see her hobbling around hopping, insisting on using crutches and refusing to use the leg that we have so long prayed to be healed, feels like a mockery and insult to the gift she’s been given.

But tonight at church, we were talking about sin and man, and we read these verses:

What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? By no means! How can we who died to sin still live in it? Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.  For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we shall certainly be united with him in a resurrection like his. We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. For one who has died has been set free from sin. Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. We know that Christ, being raised from the dead, will never die again; death no longer has dominion over him. For the death he died he died to sin, once for all, but the life he lives he lives to God. So you also must consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus. Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, to make you obey its passions. Do not present your members to sin as instruments for unrighteousness, but present yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life, and your members to God as instruments for righteousness. For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace.

As a believer in Christ, my body of sin has been brought to “nothing” by Jesus’ work on the cross, in order that I might “walk in newness of life.” But how often do I walk as though I am still enslaved to sin? Defeated? Scared? Clinging to various “crutches”, like my pride, attempting to be good enough or do enough in my own strength and power, hobbling around, limp? When God has given me not just a new leg, but a new body? What a mockery I make of Jesus abundant gift on the cross when I fail to present myself “to God as those who have been brought from death to life….”

I was immensely humbled and so thankful for such a gracious Father who not only purchased me and made me new, but loves me despite my failings, and who deals with me patiently and lovingly! I pray that I will walk in the freedom He has given me, and that I will be able to model His grace with my daughter as she goes through the next several days.

“And so the LORD says, ‘These people say they are Mine. They honor Me with their lips, but their hearts are far from Me. And their worship of Me is nothing but man-made rules learned by rote.’” Isaiah 29:13 (NLT)

“Man-made rules learned by rote.” I’ve been in church since the Sunday after I was born. I don’t say that to brag. It’s just the way it is. My parents brought me to church every single Sunday unless I was sick, which was rare. We even went to church when we were on vacation. Because of this, I learned a lot of man-made rules before I learned anything about a relationship with God.

Even though I started searching the Bible as a teenager and re-imaging what I had been taught, there are still traditions that I struggle with. I don’t have a problem refuting the “don’t run or eat or drink in God’s house” mentality, but many traditions do cloud my heart. When I fail at them, I feel like I’ve failed with God. One example is reading my Bible daily. Some days, it just doesn’t happen, and even though I have spent time in the presence of God, I still feel like a failure because I haven’t read His Word. At other times, I have sung worship songs and not really worshiped God through them.

While the man-made rules I’ve learned aren’t as extensive as the ones the Israelite priests were expecting others to follow, they still keep me from truly worshiping God. Sometimes it’s the shame of not doing what I “should.” Sometimes it’s because I get so caught up in the things I “should be” doing that I fail to do the things that lead me to a closer walk with my Lord.

I honor Him with my lips, but my heart is far from Him.

Micah 6:8 is such an awesome reminder of what God requires of us.

“No, O people, the LORD has told you what is good, and this is what He requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.” (NLT)

May I walk ever-closer and ever-lower with Him!

Get a blank notebook. A pen. Your Bible. And write the Word. Verse by verse, chapter by chapter, book by book, write God’s word in your own handwriting. I love the heart that Traci from I’ll Take Tea shares about how it encourages her to pray for those working right now to translate Scripture into other languages! I thought about the idea for several hours, but couldn’t seem to shake it. That night I found a blank composition notebook, one of my Wycliffe pens, and I opened my Bible to Acts. We are studying it right now at church, so it seemed like a great place to start.

My goal is a chapter a day, but I have stumbled and tripped along the way, and some chapters are fairly long. I’ve been amazed at all the things I have noticed through this simple practice. Writing God’s word has really helped me to meditate on it. My mind likes to race in a million different directions, especially right now with everything we have going on in our lives. But I can choose, word by word, to focus on what I am writing. It calms me. Stills my mind. Allows God’s word to soak in far differently than it does while I am reading, particularly since I am a fast reader.

This isn’t a new idea. When I mentioned it on my facebook page recently, a wonderful lady from church messaged me to let me know that this is something she has done for years. She wrote the entire Torah in one year, and has continued writing the Word. She said she felt it was something every believer would benefit from.

When he takes the throne of his kingdom, he is to write for himself on a scroll a copy of this law, taken from that of the priests, who are Levites. It is to be with him, and he is to read it all the days of his life so that he may learn to revere the LORD his God and follow carefully all the words of this law and these decrees. Deuteronomy 17:18-19

Would you pray about joining me to write the Word? Have you ever done something similar? Connect on Twitter with #writetheword and on Facebook here!

“In that day it shall be said to Jerusalem: ‘Do not fear; Zion, let not your hands be weak. The LORD your God in your midst, The Mighty One, will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.” Zephaniah 3:16-17

The last part of verse 17 caught my eyes. He will rejoice over you with gladness. He will quiet you with His love. He will rejoice over you with singing.

See, my little 18 month old daughter is anything but quiet. There are days when I want to pull my hair out. She’s always curious, always into something, and she has hurt Lily several times. We have even found teeth marks on Lily from Abby biting her. Some days I wonder how on earth this crazy girl will ever calm down!

My frustrations with her come out in hurtful words too often. I’m quick to get angry and lash out, and I forget so many times that a lot of my frustration comes from simple personality differences.

This verse, though? It reminds me that God doesn’t see my daughter this way. That He will rejoice over her with gladness. That He will quiet her with His love. That He will rejoice over her with singing.

I don’t always see her full potential. I’m limited in my understanding. Thankfully God isn’t. He sees beyond the biting and the fighting to stay awake. He sees who she will be, in all of her extroverted and high-energy wonderfulness. I pray to remember this truth! And when I do, I remind Abby of it, too.

]]> http://sistersncloth.com/2012/09/05/worship-wednesday/feed/ 0 http://sistersncloth.com/2012/08/29/worship-wednesday-a-cord-of-three-strands/ http://sistersncloth.com/2012/08/29/worship-wednesday-a-cord-of-three-strands/#comments Wed, 29 Aug 2012 12:00:06 +0000 Melissa http://sistersncloth.com/?p=4297 Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 says (emphasis mine):

Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him – a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

My husband and I are beginning our training with Wycliffe Bible Translators. One of the first parts of that has been a reminder that we need to intentionally take care of our relationship with Christ. One of the ways we do that is through our interdependence with other people in the body of Christ. We need each other!

Some of our reading talked about “spiritual friendships.” Friends that will hold you accountable. People who you can be real with, who will look you in the eye and ask where you are at with your relationship with God. Who aren’t afraid to ask the hard questions or state the hard truths.

I’ve been actively involved in a local church for many years. I’ve also been part of a small group Bible study as part of my church. There is great community there, but it doesn’t always provide this kind of true, soul-searching, honest accountability. I’m sure if I stepped into obvious, blatant sin, the people in my church and small group would lovingly confront me. I’m also sure that if I had any obvious need, they would be there for me. They already have been on more than one occasion!

But I’ve experienced something in my own life that I think is not uncommon. Even in those kinds of relationships, its easy to stick a smile on, and gloss over the fact that I haven’t touched my Bible in two weeks, or that I’m struggling with serious anger issues with my children, or that I am spiraling into depression again.

I’m working on developing some spiritual friendships, so that I can have a more intimate accountability and edification (with someone besides just my husband), and so that I can pour that same gift out into other people’s lives. I have at least one friend that I hope to start meeting with in person once a week or once every other week for coffee and heart-to-hearts. I have also treasured my last few months as part of a small group of “Good Morning, Girls” (and by small I mean me, Jeniffer, and one other person!). We started a private facebook group and share from our Bible reading each day. It has been a huge, huge blessing in my life, and has really helped me with getting into the Word daily. I am still far from perfect, and I failed my commitment to them more than once, but I am so much better than I used to be with it.

What are some ways you seek out intentional, intimate community with other believers? What kind of difference have those “spiritual friendships” made in your life?

In 1 Corinthians 5, Paul starts off by calling out the Corinthians for accepting a man who had married his father’s wife (possibly his stepmother). He tells them that unbelievers don’t even do that, and the unbelievers in the area were known for their sexual sins! Instead of reprimanding this man, they were proud of their acceptance. Paul reminds them that they are supposed to keep away from those who practice sexual sins…but only those who are in the church.

I wrote to you in my epistle not to keep company with sexually immoral people. Yet I certainly did not mean with the sexually immoral people of this world, or with the covetous, or extortioners, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world. But now I have written to you not to keep company with anyone named a brother, who is sexually immoral, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or an extortioner–not even to eat with such a person. For what have I to do with judging those who are outside? Do you not judge those who are inside? But those who are outside God judges. therefore put away from yourselves the evil person. 1 Corinthians 5: 9-12 (emphasis mine)

Just as Paul reminds us in 1 Corinthians 4 that we can only assess the fruits of a believer and only God can judge their private motives, he also reminds us here that God alone can judge those who aren’t believers. We do, however, have the responsibility to call out believers who are not living fruitful lives.

These two chapters are still mulling around in my head. They have changed the way I look at differing opinions in the church and how quick I am to want to correct someone else. But at the same time, it has made me more aware of how often I judge someone who isn’t a Christian and how harsh I can be to someone who doesn’t know or care to know better. I honestly love when my perspective changes based on scripture!

Around Isaiah 40 the tone starts to change. God assures Israel that He isn’t going to completely destroy them, and that He is their Savior and Redeemer. There are a lot of great verses to contemplate in this chapter, but I particularly loved Isaiah 40:10-11.

Behold, the Lord GOD comes with might, and his arm rules for him; behold, his reward is with him, and his recompense before him. He will tend his flock like a shepherd, he will gather the lambs in his arms; he will carry them in his bosom, and gently lead those that are with young.

He will gently lead those that are with young… Oh, what encouragement and joy in those verses! As a mom, I so often need His grace and strength to get me through my days. Raising these children He’s blessed me with is by far one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. Knowing that every day I am teaching them who He is by the example I set. Am I teaching them truths or lies? Then there are the never ending tasks that feel like such drudgery. Changing diapers, dishes, laundry, baths, meals… And always there is someone there demanding my time and attention. Knowing it will start all over again the next morning.

I fail constantly. But He is oh so gentle with me, even when I need His correction. I pray that my children will be able to see that same gentleness as I parent them.

And where can I get the strength to mother these little ones with Christ-like gentleness, even when the days are long?

Have you not known? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Isaiah 40:28-29

How have you experienced His gentle leading? What are some ways you’ve felt Him give you strength?

The first set of verses that challenge me are 1 Corinthians 4:3-5.

As for me, it matters very little how I might be evaluated by you or by any human authority. I don’t even trust my own judgment on this point. My conscience is clear, but that doesn’t prove I’m right. It is the Lord himself who will examine me and decide. So don’t make judgments about anyone ahead of time—before the Lord returns. For he will bring our darkest secrets to light and will reveal our private motives. Then God will give to each one whatever praise is due.

Many times, I have read verses and started evaluating everyone by them. I have judged when I shouldn’t, and I get angry when others preach and teach something against what God has shown me. My conscience is clear, so I must be right. But even Paul says that his clear conscience means nothing to him. All private motives and thoughts will be brought to light one day, and being right for the sake of being right shouldn’t be my goal.

I love that Paul admits that only God can truly examine him, which is a truly humbling statement. When I remember that my thoughts, my actions aren’t able to be fully judged by anyone but God, it makes me check myself before saying what I really want to. Why do I think this is right? Is what I’m about to say something this person needs to hear? Can I back it up with scripture, or is it just a feeling? I have had strong opinions that were based on feelings and reason. Some of these have been refuted by scripture and others have been backed up by scripture. But like Paul says, only God is able to truly judge if my opinions and convictions are founded in truth.

My sporadic moods are  affecting how I feel about everything, including how close I “feel” to God. Monday was a great day, and I “felt” very close to Him. Then again, I “felt” close to everyone. It was a great day for me, and I was able to enjoy it. But then yesterday came. Yesterday was hard. Abby woke me up (instead of me waking up on my own), then I ended up sweeping and mopping the floor after our glass measuring bowl fell and shattered. I was more than worn out, and my mood reflected that. I didn’t care to have the energy for my daughter, much less for God.

This morning, I played catch up and read the 42nd and 43rd Psalm. These psalms were once one poem and were divided to make their usage in the temple easier. The first is a lament while the second declares trust in God. Both end with this refrain: “Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; for I shall yet praise Him, the help of my countenance and my God.”

I have a hard time hoping in and praising God, even when I’m not pregnant! I “feel” discouraged, and it bleeds over into all aspects of life. This refrain is such a great reminder to me that no matter how I feel, I need to praise Him. I need to hope in Him. Deciding to hope and to praise is half of the battle! When I do, my mood changes. My outlook is brighter. I’m a much more pleasant person to be around, too.

My 11th and 12th grade Sunday School teacher used to recite, “Feelings come and feelings go, but feelings are deceiving. My warrant is the Word of God. Nothing else is worth believing.” While I do believe that God can speak to us in other ways, our feelings shouldn’t and can’t be our only foundation. They need to be kept in check, and I often fail miserably at that. I pray that this verse will remind me to praise God even in the midst of overwhelming feelings!